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To me, it seems that French guys are more direct without all the mind games.

Dating isn’t really a game at all and is straightforward and uncomplicated.

These rules dictate where, when, with whom and in what manner we flirt.

We generally obey these unofficial laws instinctively, without being conscious of doing so.

Through the years I, like most of you, I’m sure, have found myself in those infamous and utterly maddening situations.

You meet, you hit it off, you get really excited because you’ve finally found a great guy, and after that…silence.

According to some evolutionary psychologists, flirting may even be the foundation of civilisation as we know it.

Tom is the only French guy I’ve ever dated, so I had it easy when it came to the whole French dating game. Our relationship developed from genuine friendship and wasn’t rushed or forced.

Before heading home, J and I planned a date for that Thursday.

We exchanged numbers, kissed, said our goodbyes, and I left feeling quite pleased with myself, knowing that I had played my cards right. I wasn’t expecting a call on Monday or Tuesday because of the ‘rules’ and all that, but by Wednesday night I started to feel a little panicked. By 7 pm I had two choices: resign myself to the fact that he isn’t into me, or do something I had never, ever done before- call him. As the phone rang I practiced the message I would leave on his voicemail in my head but was interrupted when, to my astonishment, a very perplexed-sounding J answered the phone.

He’s really easy going, spoke a good level of English when we met and was familiar with American culture from TV and movies (and what did I know about French dating culture at the time? But as time went on and we discovered more about dating customs in our respective countries, we felt lucky to have found each other and just let things work naturally.

The “rules” and differences between French and American dating culture are definitely there, but if you don’t know about them, you might end up hurt and confused or leave someone else feeling that way.